My Blog__ AN OPEN LETTER TO MY HAIR
These are a few of the things I'm sorry about, hair.
First off, I just want to say that I love you. I know that I have treated you carelessly in the past, but this ends now. I have done so many things to you and you never complain. You never dry out. You never break off. Sure, sometimes you fall out in scary little chunks but I feel like that is just your way of telling me something isn't right. I know I may not show it, but I care about you, hair. I really, really do and I want you to grow. Will you do that for me, hair?
Before we take our relationship to the middle-of-the-back length, I feel like I should apologize for a few things. After all, I don't expect you to move forward unless you feel like you can trust me again.
1. I'm sorry that I dyed you with Strawberry Pink Koolaid, twice.
2. I'm sorry that I ever put Peroxide on you.
3. I'm sorry that I only washed you with a bar of soap for an entire year and did not use conditioner. That must have hurt.
4. I'm sorry I cut you into a wig-like bob with the Dracula point and dyed you black and that everyone thought you were not real.
5. I'm sorry that I got drunk and let Michelle cut most of you off into that weird, slanted-do and that you had to stay like that for a week until I could make an appointment at the salon.
6. I'm sorry I let that Dutch hairdresser turn you gray. She kept saying, "Milkshake!" I thought I had it under control, but I didn't.
7. I'm sorry I let you get so dangerously short.
8. I'm very sorry about the dreads in grade ten.
9. I'm very, very sorry about the spiral perm in grade eight.
10. I'm very, very, very, very sorry about the corn rows in grade nine.
I know it's not easy, but I hope you can forgive me. I am turning over a new leaf. I vow to shampoo, condition and massage you with Moroccan Oil for the rest of your days. Promise.