June 01, 2009 | By

Remember that shitty show with those shitty kids who wore shitty clothes and spoke in shitty teen dialect? Yeah, you know the one. It's Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County. And by 'Laguna Beach' I mean 'Guido Beach' and by 'real' I mean 'retarded'. Well, that shit show morfed into The Hills which featured similar shitty kids, wearing even shittier clothes and pretending to lead shitty adult lives. They also got shitty boyfriends and went to shitty clubs were they always got into shitty arguments over such shitty topics as "Does Grey Goose Vodka have, like, less calories?" or who called who a "fucking cunt face liar". It was brain numbingly awesome.

The Hills just wrapped up Season Five (who allowed this retardation to last for that long?) and I recently saw the video premiere for Season Six and guess what? Everyone's favorite nothing-burger bitch, Kristin Cavallari is back! Yes! She shows up to add an extra element of drama by fucking her way into the friend group and ultimately pissing everyone off. I can't wait to see who breaks a nail first by stabbing Kirstin in the eye ball. I vote Lauren (those two go way back, I think they both failed Math 10 together) but it seems like Audrina has the heat in the situation. Justin Bobby got a beard (again) and has dropped his biker look and replaced it with fat Dad steez, but Kristin wants him bad. How will the drama unfold this time around?

Watch the preview video here.

p.s - On the plus side, Heidi is starting to look like Courtney Love.

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