News__ Beyoncé Was Here
Beyoncé releases a new video. We want more pregnant belly shots.
Hang on. Can we talk about Beyoncé for a second? And by "second," we obviously mean, like, all the seconds of every single day. If we lived in a perfect world, that's really all we would ever do--talk about Beyoncé. We would pack it all in and become professional Beyoncé Knowles historians. TV execs would call on us to impart our extensive knowledge of all things Bey for those horrible/amazing clip shows/True Hollywood Stories/retrospectives because we would be the best in the biz. And then, one magical day, we would find ourselves in line at the same Chipotle, and Beyoncé would be all like, "Hey! I recognize you! You really know your shit about me! As a token of my gratitude, I'm going to gift you my firstborn." Then we would sing "Halo" together and she would let us do the second verse because it's our favorite and she's just super chill like that.
Anyway, Big Momma B has been pushing out new videos from her latest release, 4, as fast as she can so as not to interfere with the other thing she's going to have to push out in not too long. Now, generally, we've always found music videos that just pull from live footage to be kind of lazy, and autobiographical montages are usually, without question, narcissistic and dry, but this is Beyoncé we're talking about, and it you say anything negative about her, we will cut you.